Harbor Life Ministries

It was a long week following the birth of Sofia on Sunday, although she and birthmother Hanna did well with the delivery and post partum.

Hanna left the hospital Monday afternoon. Baby Sofia had to stay in the hospital until the adoption, which was planned to take place on Friday.

Hanna met Monday evening with licensed social worker Peggy Dodds to do assessment paperwork for the adoption, a process required in Ohio to ensure that the birthmother is aware of all the laws concerning adoption and is making the adoption choice of her own free will.

Hanna spent much of the week packing her school books and all her belongings that she had collected while being in Ohio. It was hard to believe she had collected so much in such a short time. Hanna and her mother Sara spent Tuesday and Wednesday packing and taking things to the post office to ship home to Arizona.

Hanna also was able to visit Sofia daily while Sofia was in the hospital. Thursday Hanna and her mother decided to cook dinner for the family, since Hanna was already on the schedule to cook her chicken enchiladas. We had a great family dinner night, with the girls, Kirsten, Hanna and KC?s rendition of ?Wait for You?. [Note: see earlier blog post re: Hanna's last supper].

Late in the evening Thursday a call came from the attorney regarding a small glitch that had developed with the adoption. The problem stemmed from the fact that Hanna was from Arizona, the adoptive parents were from Indiana and the baby was born in Ohio. Somehow no one had noticed this fact until 4:30 p.m. on Thursday, or least no one had seen that it presented any kind of a problem until then.

Let me point out something here. The counseling that Hanna had for three months leading up this point in time was extensive and complete. She knew by this point what she wanted to do, that it was the right thing for her, for Sofia and for the adoptive family, and she was quite ready to do it and move on past this part of her life. She and her mom Sara were supposed to be on a plane out of Cleveland on Friday evening. Now the legal situation was threatening to postpone everything further. We looked at many options, including?

• Give custody of Sofia to an adoption agency and the agency would try and place her in a few months. That option would require Sofia going into foster care at the adoptive parents’ expense. There was no guarantee that the adoptive parents would get to spend time with Sofia, as that would be up to the foster family. The cost to the adoptive family would be $50 a day for the care of the baby as well as about $900 in agency expenses. This also would not guarantee the baby to go with the family that Hanna had selected, spent time with, gotten to know and desired to raise her baby. Hanna would also have to stay in Ohio until at least Wednesday with this plan.
• Hanna just keeps the baby, put her in a babysitting arrangement until the adoption could go through. This would be with one of the relief staff of Harbor House and at no cost to the family and the family would stay with and care for Sofia.

Neither of these options, the best at the time, did not guarantee that Ohio and Indiana were ever going to approve the adoption. After praying about options and seeking the Lord’s guidance on the best outcome for both Hanna and Sofia, the attorney and Karla spoke Friday morning. There was a new option.

• Option 3: Contact an AZ attorney and do an AZ to IN adoption. We were just unsure how that would work, being that we always use an Ohio attorney. However John Huffman was able to get in touch with an attorney in Arizona that gave great direction and guidance. The end plan accomplished everyone?s goals and in a shorter amount of time, and was the most straight-forward legally.

We met with Hanna, her mother and the adoptive parents and explained what had happened, all the twists and turns that had taken place overnight, and what all the options looked like. There were a lot of questions and after about an hour of discussion, everyone agreed that the third option was the best. Even so, when Sara called her husband to explain it, he was immediately skeptical. You have to know Paul, though; he is a Type A individual, he was in Arizona, his family was in Ohio, and now suddenly the whole plan had changed.

Karla spoke at length with Paul and he finally agreed on the new plan, so the attorneys drew up the paperwork to allow the adoptive parents to temporarily care for the baby. Everyone then headed to the hospital where Sofia was released to Hanna, who put the baby in the car seat in the adoptive parents car, and then Hanna got into her car with her mother and headed for the airport. They were able to catch their flight to AZ at 8:15 as scheduled, arriving home after midnight. Sofia and the adoptive parents headed to Indiana to spend the weekend.

Hanna spent Saturday with her father and her friends, explaining to them these past few months and sharing what had gone on in her life.

There was still one very important piece to the adoption that needed to be put in place in Arizona: the birthfather’s signature/approval was still needed. The AZ attorney was scheduled to meet with Hanna and the birthfather to get both their signatures on the paperwork.

Hanna was a bit reluctant to sign her papers first before the birthfather because of the thought that she might sever her rights, only to have him unexpectedly not sign the paperwork and possibly get custody (although paternity had not been established through DNA testing, making it unlikely that scenario could have played out).

Even with Hanna’s concerns, the birthfather showed up and, after an hour-and-a-half of talking and counseling, he signed the papers.

The adoptive mom Julie along with Julie’s mother and Sofia all arrived in Arizona on Monday night where they would meet with the attorney, meet the birthfather, and spend some time with Hanna before returning to Indiana.

On Thursday, Sofia met her birthfather. It was a great meeting. The birthfather (as well as everyone else who sees her) believes Sofia to be the most beautiful baby in the world.

As of today, Hanna and the birthfather, having signed, are done with their part of the adoption. The adoptive mom Julie awaits notice from Indiana that she can return home, and Sofia is well on her way to having a great life, with such a large extended family.

There are some winters where you feel sorry for the people who own snowmobiles and snowblowers, and you believe the scientists are right about global warming.

The other winters are good winters, even if it means too many back-breaking shoveling days, because winter north of the 38th parallel is supposed to be white on most days that fall between Christmas and the day when the buzzards return to Hinckley.

So when the school shuts down for a snow day–something that legislators believe should happen no more than five times per winter in Ohio (although morning delays can happen as often as you like)–the focus of most young minds will shift to the “Hill.”

In Celina, the “Hill” is a man-made pile of ground in Eastview Park that acts as a barrier in summer to keep the long balls from rolling into the pond. On a snow day in winter, however, the Hill–which is only maybe 50 yards in any direction from its summit to the flatlands at the base–is filled with hundreds of kids. It’s like the mall on a Saturday in mid-December.

That’s why we sledded at night, usually after 11 p.m. If we wanted to go day-sledding we would leave Celina altogether and head 6 miles due east on the double-lane, to the first exit with a ramp up. From the top of the ramp, the Hill–which was only snow-covered when we had at least 6 inches of snow due to the tall weeds–gently sloped down about 500 feet to meet an Ohio Department of Transportation fence.

No one else knew of this place. At least we never found anyone else sledding on our hill.

Norwalk has a “Hill” too. It’s called Hogan’s Hill and it’s all natural; nothing manmade except the guardrail that separates the children from the traffic which seems to pass dangerously close. Thankfully the road borders the peak of the hill and not its base. That’s the river’s job, although it meanders far enough away from the bottom to keep from being dangerous to slide into.

We made our first trip to Hogan’s Hill today–Sara, Kara, Kavin and me. It’s about a five minute walk to Hogan’s Hill and now I know that the excitement from sledding in Norwalk comes from walking on Elm Street, which has no sidewalk on the hill side of the road. Just the guardrail.

Just to prove I haven’t turned 50 yet I gave Hogan’s Hill a try. It was a lot of fun but after trudging back up the hill I proved that I’m closer to 50 than I am to 40. Maybe I discovered the origin of the expression “over the Hill.”

Hanna returned to Arizona safely. There was some concern as a winter storm headed up the east coast, causing lots of delayed flights in New York City, but the flight from Cleveland to Phoenix was unaffected.

Hanna called this afternoon and sounded great. She had a great day Saturday with her dad Paul. They watched a movie together, then Paul took Hanna out to pick up her friends. They entered into a good discussion about adoption and why Hanna chose that plan for Sofia. Hanna related back to us that some of the questions were good—hard questions—but having her dad their to help answer them was much better than trying to defend her decision without him around.

I am so glad that I don’t take care of the ministry’s finances anymore. That doesn’t mean that I don’t think about them a lot, just less than every waking moment, as I’m sure Tami did before she had her baby. Now I’m sure she thinks about wailing, feeding, soothing, and diaper-changing in the wee hours of the night instead of accounts payable.

There was a donation that came in the mail yesterday from our anonymous donor, the one who underwrote the expenses here for a year. It was designated to cover a few bills that were outstanding from renovation and repair work done to the house late last summer.

One of the bills, for labor to install new shingles on the garage, had already been paid when the work was done, so this part of the donation was now free to be used in other ways. That went to paying the staff, who have been gracious and understanding during this time. I’m praying that God continues to meet the need.

If you’re reading this and want to help, it’s an easy click to Network for Good, where you can make a donation to help.

We continue to thank our God who is faithful to meet our needs.

School in Norwalk was delayed today due to about 3 inches of snow that fell overnight, but it was not cancelled. That affects Kirsten and K.C. but not Kavin or Sara, who are home-schooled.

Karla is… “27.” Yeah, that’s it, that’s the ticket. She is 27 today but not looking a day over 26.

She does share her birthday with her sister-in-law Cathy (married to her brother Todd) and with George Washington. (And this time I’m being perfectly honest wit’ you.)

The kitchen at Harbor House is always a busy place prior to mealtime. Tonight was no exception.

Hanna prepared her special recipe, “Southwest Chicken Casserole,” her last meal preparation before she heads back home to Arizona tomorrow.

Hanna’s mother Sara helped her with the meal. It involves taking rotisserie chicken, deboning it, and putting in a casserole dish with salsa and lots of cheese. Lots of cheese. That makes it really great to eat.

To help keep from thinking about all those calories in the casserole, it was accompanied by a spinach salad. Not bad to eat either.

The best part of the meal, other than the food, was the spontaneous singing that broke out when Hanna, Kirsten, KC, Sara, and Kavin joined voices for a rousing rendition of “Wait For You,” a tribute to the unique and joyful version sung recently by contestant Paul Stafford on TV’s “American Idol.” Two thumbs up.

The worst part of the meal… knowing it was Hanna’s last one here. I know she’s ready to be back home, but Arizona already has more sunshine than they need. We’ll miss her warmth, her quiet and gentle spirit.

Yes, she was a little early, but Hanna and baby Sofia are doing fine.

Her labor began last Friday night. After not feeling well all day she went to bed early, but was up and down all night with contraction pains, something that wasn?t discovered by housemother Karla until Saturday morning when Hanna told her about the restless night she?d had.

The contractions continued through the day on Saturday, never progressing any quicker than 5-7 minutes apart. Hanna kept up a normal activity level until the evening when she headed to bed early again, this time hoping for a full night?s sleep.

She was back up before 11 pm and so she took a shower, hoping it would relax her. Around 2:30 am Sunday morning Karla timed the contractions at two minutes, so they headed off to the hospital.

A call was put in to Hanna?s parents in Arizona, and Hanna?s mother Sara booked a 6:15 am flight from Phoenix to Cleveland. Karla wondered if she would miss the birth or not.

The adoptive parents were also called but the weather for them was freezing rain and too dangerous to drive in. They decided to wait on the weather and hope it changed for the better. If it did, they had a three-hour drive to make.

At the hospital a nurse checked Hanna. Although the contractions were still close together, Hanna?s body wasn?t ready. Her labor pains had gotten much worse so an epidural was ordered.

By 8 am it was safe enough for Jason and Julie to head out. Hanna had dropped off to sleep, having gotten relief from the numbing epidural. Sara was still somewhere in the skies over the heartland.

Hanna woke up when Jason and Julie arrived around 11:30. Then the call came from Sara that she had touched down at Hopkins, an hour away from the hospital. She was grabbing her luggage, grabbing her rental car and would be on the road by noon. Jason and Julie went to get some lunch while Hanna and Karla waited in the room.

At 1 pm the doctor stopped back to check Hanna. She was complete and ready to push so the doctor broke her water while Karla started making phone calls. Jason and Julie had not returned from lunch yet and the cell phone they had wouldn?t work in the hospital. Sara was reached but she had gotten lost and was still at least 30 minutes away.

The nurses prepped Hanna and got the room ready. Jason and Julie were still not back. Another call was put in to Sara. She was still lost and 20 minutes away.

It was 1:30 and Hanna was trying hard not to push, praying her mother would make it.

At 1:50 pm on Sunday, February 17, 2008, everyone converged. Sara and Julie walked into the hospital room just in time to witness the final arrival, Sofia Nevaeh, who popped out at 2:02 pm. She was healthy and round, weighing in at 8 lb. 4.5 oz. but measuring just 19 inches long.

Hanna got to meet Sofia shortly after the birth. They knew each other, that was apparent. Hanna called her mother Sara over to see her, and then invited Jason, Julie and their son Jax over. Jax, 6, tentatively held his hand out and touched her lightly, then recoiled. A sister was going to take a little getting used to.

Both Hanna and her family believe that Jason and Julie were chosen by God ahead of time to be Sofia?s parents. There have been so many confirmations that to retell them all is a story in and of itself.

It’s a difficult adjustment for most new residents to make to maternity home life. Sara arrived Saturday and seems to be adapting.

At the same time, Hanna has had to make adjustments as well. As the lone resident last week, she enjoyed a relaxed schedule with a flexible bedtime and chore list. With Sara’s arrival, a cleaning schedule with assigned tasks and rooms was put in place and bedtime is now strictly enforced.

At 6 AM, each girl should be up and be ready to start household chores while Karla makes breakfast. Morning chores include dusting, mopping, sweeping, vacuuming, and picking up/organizing/putting away.